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Life Coaching Tips and Techniques No. 77

Life Coach (0,0)

The vocation of life coach

What is your genius? Mine Is to be able to learn from my mistakes. When the tendency is to forget them, to leave them in your mind and work on them. It is my gift to be inured to the pain it is something that I have taught myself and is the only way to resolve it - hold your hand to the flame. For example I recently purchased a treadmill (or put in a bid to buy one) and suddenly whilst running (outside) realised that the room I was going to put it in had too low a ceiling to accommodate me running on top of the treadmill. How could I have made this simple mistake?

It was because the low ceiling of the room had become such a normal thing for me, I never gave it a second thought in the routine context. As a result I never gave it a second in the context of the treadmill either. It was just part of my built environment and it never occurred to me to think of it as other than completely normal and an accepted part of my life. It provided a comfort and shelter for reading and I never gave it another thought when I decided to buy a treadmill.

Lessons Learnt

As a life coach you learn lessons so that others might benefit. It is the things that you are most used to, that you most get accommodated to that will trip you up. Whether as part of your everyday environment that needs to acclimatise the change or as part of the new environment that you're creating (and we're talking about the part of it that's already part of you that's you're habituated with already) in either case it is that acceptance and comfort with your surroundings that will be the cause of the problem once you decide to execute the change.

Change is frightening, so terrifying that we try and assimilate as soon as we can before the natural process of adaptation has had time to do its work.

When I did the risk analysis I omitted 'something' that up to now was perfectly safe without realising that if I was going to change some parameters related to it (to a change in usage so to speak), that it would actually change the safety/purpose/utility characteristic of that 'something'.

It so happens that you research, plan, talk to people and get to know as much about something as a lay person can before you actually make the decision, that that create a certain familiarity with the material that is beguiling deceiving.

It is that 'familiarity' that hides the unknown/unseen risk, you no longer fear what you know or think you know. That is a fatal mistake. As a lay person you must always treat the material with respect with a certain regard you reserve for strangers as if it could turn on you at any time and go bad.

Even professionals make mistakes within their own material and expertise so it is very easy for even intelligent amateurs to stuff up and do so extravagantly.

I can count the number of times in my life when I have stuffed up but have yet done all the research required possible, talked to all the right people, discussed it with all the experts and yet still made a catastrophic error. Why is this so? Because I thought I was the expert in these areas when I wasn't and couldn't be in 2 weeks of research and familiarity.

The other main times when I've stuffed up have been when I have been under stress, under duress and I have made decisions in a panic (of my own doing) but that is the subject for another article. The solution is to drastically increase your capability so that it is well within your performance envelope.

Even the most exceptional people stuff up badly. The consequences of making a mistake include not making a recovery from it ever, not accepting and learning from it and moving on, making no further attempts at anything that might have a hint of risk where failure is a possibility.

Every breath we take has within it the possibility of failure, every breath could be our last, one breath one day will be the last.

There is no guarantee in life that you won't make a mistake, there is only the certainty that you will, no matter how much planning you do or precautions you take. The most you can do is mitigate the effects of the mistakes by understanding/accepting the possible fall-out and for next time you will be placed to make a better decision.

Even if you do nothing you will make mistakes, mistakes of omission rather than action. Doing nothing is a mistake.

There is no prelude to action, there is only action.

To be able to gracefully learn from your mistakes takes a certain level of maturity, a certain strength of personality and of self that will not allow you to draw into a defensive posture at the first hint of fallout from your trouble.

When people are lost, unsure of what is going on, unsure of the future, when the present is perilous what can a life coach do? What should a life coach do?

A life coach is that person who provides a point of reference in cartesian terms they are at point (0,0) and they can help with anchoring the present.

This is especially so when people are leading extremely busy lives yet with no real sense of purpose of the divine of the creative in their lives.

A person who can anchor people at point (0,0) is in great demand by society especially when there is a lot of bad news going around especially on the economic front.

People are petrified of losing their jobs but it is inevitable that there will be an economic shakeout unless your particular economy and your particular company within that country is geared to the Chinese and Indian economy.

Any company of any decent size in the world (say $100m turnover or greater) must be thinking of China and India. There are very particular and peculiar ways to enter these markets, the charlatans are many, those with the connections they say they have are very few.

Don't get caught in such mass hysteria as the panic after 9/11 or the Tsunami natural disaster, tragic though those are, you are but one person and your mission is to focus on your goal. Don't get distracted by what is happening in the periphery (at least where you are concerned).

Do you need a particular person in your life to help you move forward especially at difficult times? If yes, acknowledge the place of this person. Of course they know it already.

I have had people ring me twice or three times a day and then again at night to get my help. Before I became a life coach. Being a life coach means putting a price on your time, on your life, on your free time.

My father had the genius for understanding and helping people and did it for nothing consequently he did not have any time to himself. People do not value your time when it is freely given.

I charge for my help consequently I do have time to myself. For what you say? Well for writing the column you are reading for example. It might be written at 11 pm but it is vibrant and full of sunshine. To also write a book on life coaching with one on executive coaching being planned.

It is human nature to take as much of your time as possible especially if you're really good at what you do. The better you are the more problems you can solve in an hour. The problem is you are with these people 4 or 6 hours and your mind is absolutely vanquished at the end of it.

In a life coaching session as I know the person is paying me $135 per hour, I pick up from the client as much as I can quickly as I can so I learn fast but the give back twice as much as I receive. I teach/mentor/coach people so that they learn fast, very fast with me.

I provide two levels of support, one big picture and strategic and this picture relies on a synthesis of the information you give me about yourself, your relationships, your work, your situations. The strategy is basically taking an army of 5000 men and directing it to three main campaigns (same front, same enemy only Napoleon and Hitler to do war on two fronts) with the geography and topology to boot.

The other is more basic and is about providing advice about the day to day problems and routine. You may be planning a wedding, a great career move, opening a shop I can help you with some of the nitty gritty details of planning and execution. Ideally the day to day and routine should be someway down the path of executing your strategic vision.

Strategy and tactical/day to day routine are one and the same approach. There is no difference. Just like power and influence are one indivisible. Politicians know this instinctively so should you. Top corporate performers play off influence power with the greatest of subtlety and finesse.

About Gilbert Labour

Gilbert Labour is a Six Sigma consultant, a process improvement expert, a project management practitioner and published author in this field, a Life Coach, an IT professional and an Executive Coach with 30 years experience working in modern organisations in Australia so is brilliantly and uniquely placed to observe the current malaise in modern organisations riven by the demands of the global economy and fuelled by poor, non-existent leadership.

He also owns and runs one of the world's most popular web sites dealing with Life and Executive Coaching. This web site provides comprehensive coverage of life coaching together with a wide array of tips and techniques for life coaches and the clients.

He says never in the last 30 years have Executive Coaches been in so much demand and never have their role been so poorly understood. The best Executive Coaches have 20-30 years experience in corporate environments so this is a given but it is not their role to usurp the decision making capability of the EXEC (though they can and should/do assist), it is to support them so that they are in a position to make the very best decision, make the best recommendation that they are capable of.

For example in an organisation undergoing/requiring radical change (in today's world which aren't) they are not babysitters for the organisation or for the EXEC, their role primarily is to assist, support and coach the chosen EXEC to driven fundamental changes to the footprint of the business. It is to be their friend, their guide, their support in this incredibly difficult and challenging role.

This role can break most EXECs, especially when it involves wholesale head count reductions that may potentially destroy families, lives and lifestyle. It is the role of the Executive Coach to make sure that doesn't happen by providing constructive advice during this phase and support the EXEC emotionally during these difficult times. This is where an Executive Coach with 30 years experience can provide insights into the process and mindset of change.

About Gilbert Labour. Gilbert Labour is an Executive Coach and Life Coach practicing in Sydney Australia but with a world wide interest in coaching with one of the world's leading life and executive coaching web sites. He has 30 years corporate experience in legal, government, telecommunication, banking & finance, insurance, accounting, IT and transportation industries. He is also a process improvement (Six Sigma, Lean) expert and an IT infra-structure and development professional within those industries. During these 30 years he has seen many examples of poor leaders and managers but doesn't recall a time quite like the present when there are so many poor leaders in industry and politics. He is available to consult and support on any aspect of executive coaching as it assists organisations in the midst of radical and fundamental change including process improvement efforts preceding large retrenchment programs. He is also a project management professional able to execute Six Sigma based projects. He believes that organisational change begins with fundamental even radical personal change, for the better, in attitude and approach hence his insistent but balanced emphasis on life coaching in the context of the Executive Coaching Retreat (ECR) in Mauritius in June, 05.

Life Coaching Tips and Techniques No. 10

Obesity and the roller coaster ride from nadir to zenith and back

There are five journeys in obesity, which one are you on now?

Why are there obese people when there are people starving in the world? Is obesity a medical problem rather than one of lack of self-control or perhaps even one using food for sexual/sensual gratification for masking (?) the real problems? How successful is someone who is 250 kilos at 'masking' or hiding the problem?

The five journeys is obesity are -

Getting there becoming obese, this is the easiest journey of all and happens almost without you knowing. This journey is on the road to death.

Staying there at a steady weight, this is a hard journey because the tendency is to put on more weight not less. This journey is a slow death.

The next journey is one into hell and that is on the road to putting on more and more weight. This is the last journey these people even embark on. This journey ends in death.

The penultimate journey and the one with the most difficulty starting is the road back away from obesity. The enormous journey back is not the problem but the first step back, the first gram lost. This journey is not a journey of weight loss but a journey to lose the fears and problems that the weight gain had temporarily put on the back burner. This second last journey is the life coaching journey and has much less to do with weight loss, exercise and fitness and more to do with facing problems in their real intensity and fury perhaps for the first time since the decision taken to embark on the first journey.

The last journey and that is to keep the weight at the target weight after the massive task of weight loss because again the tendency is to put the weight back on even faster than before and much much faster than it was lost. For every gram lost a kilo is put on.

Work with a life coach who understands your weight problem is not a weight problem but a personal problem posing, impersonating a weight problem. Someone who knows which journey you are on and can make sure you either move to the next healthy journey or stay at the healthy journey you're on.

New Life Coaching Service Model - All Inclusive Platinum Service

Product Features

One new low totally all inclusive monthly fee ($400 AUS) - currently this is $500 AUS. Saving $100 AUS per month.

No contracts whatsoever, pay as you go month by month. Start when you want, stop when you want. No questions asked.

No need to furnish more than your first name. No notes taken during any sessions and no personal identifying details asked for, required or noted down.

Coaching can take place exclusively by phone and/or internet but it is preferred that an initial one on one session take place but this is not essential.

All inclusive, no exclusions, all services available (as per below).

Paid once a month at the beginning of the month (non refundable if cancelled during month).

Entitled to the full range of services (one on one, SMS, Mobile, Phone, ICQ, MSN Messenger, MS Netmeeting) on an as required basis. But does not include CD and video conferencing products.

Use as much of the service as you require but please note as coaching is a relationship which requires and places responsibility on you to complete agreed upon tasks, there will be regular scheduled feedback and catchup sessions. These are usually by phone or ICQ.

Clearly articulated and set goals such as embarking on a new career, changing careers, developing new small business, creating small business growth, preparation for retirement, developing additional income in/for retirement.

These services include small business development coaching, product development and promotion, and press release preparation.

Payment and services commences in the calendar month of first payment and lasts till the end of the next month, then regular monthy payments commence on the 1st of each month thereafter (for example) ---

Paid 1 month on 15th of July - $400

Payment due on 1st August - Nil

Payment due on 1st September - $400

Payment and services terminates at the end of the calendar month of the last payment as follows (for example) ---

Payment made on 1st October - $400

Decision to cancel made 4th October and notice to do so received on that day or any day within the month

No refund policy but services available until 31st October if required

No further payments then required due to cancellation

The Platinum Life Coaching Product is now the only life coaching product available aside from tailored programs and the featured programs.

50% Discount for bona fide students. The fee for students is $200 per month.

You will receive an exceptional level of service and care from one of the best life coaches practicing today.

Coaching Programs

555 Program

The 555 Program is complementary to the 333 Program and is part of a family of programs called The Numbered Series, a simplification of a plethora of products, services and programs into a number of specifically targeted set of programs that target a very specific audience with a limited amount of time and resources to devote to a life and executive coaching program. The programs covers a set of goals over a set period for a specific (one time only) fee.

The key goals of the 555 Program is to be able to run 5k in 5 months, to solve 5 life coaching issues or problems in 5 months and to investigate and resolve 5 executive coaching problems in 5 months.

Life Coaching Portal Programs

Beyond the existing Diamond program being run on the portal, a series of additional programs are being developed to be run for specific audiences and which have very clear targets and goals. These include the following.

The 555 Program

Gilbert Labour, will personally run this program. It will probably take in the region of 10 suitable people and run for 5 months. The program is multi-faceted and covers three main streams a fitness stream, a life coaching stream dealing with personal issues and an executive stream to supercharge your work, business and corporate environment.

The first stream is a fitness element. The goal is to be able to run 5k (non stop) in five months and be able to lose 5 kilos in the process. This is a modest achievement and is considered a healthy approach to fitness generally. I am a former fitness instructor and dance teacher and can provide guidance in this area. You will need a clearance from your doctor if you're over 45.

The second stream is a life coaching element. The goal of the life coaching is to investigate a number of current personal issues and focus on 5 for resolution in 5 months. One to be resolved or at least worked on each month.

The third stream is an executive coaching element. The goal of this element is to come up with five goals or issues to be dealt with in the 5 months of the program. These could involve working towards a promotion, changing jobs, changing careers, leaving the corporate environment and developing a small business. For the hard core executives and other corporate thrivers and survivors there will be a number of areas that include executive interview training and executive decision making that can be covered. There are many others and these can be chosen based on your current goals. The aim of this stream is canvass all the possibilities and focus on only 5 and work through each one.

The cost of the program varies. To take part on a one-on-one basis with Gilbert Labour will cost $5000. To take part in a group setting will cost $2000. Individual programs can start at anytime considered suitable.

To provide this program on a company wide basis (more than 10 people), please call Gilbert Labour for a quote.

Please call Gilbert Labour on 0409 223 436 if you would like to take part. Further information on the 555 Program is available from the portal.

General Information

I also do a small amount of pro-bono work in the area of life coaching. I belong to the Life Coaching Pro Bono Group (LCPBG), a group of life coaches I am putting together to do this type of work for people in need but who may not be able to afford the services of a full fee life coach. We make allowances for your circumstances and also on the understanding that once you're back on your feet, your capacity to contribute to your life coaching will also improve.

Generally speaking, we will set clear goals, we will put in place plans to attain those goals, we will execute the plan effectively. We will monitor and survey the results and ensure our goals are met. In most cases, we will envelope what we are trying to achieve into a coaching programme.

I operate flexibly taking into account the needs of the client as we progress with the programme.

Please call me on my mobile (0409 223 436) for a confidential discussion to begin the journey of self discovery.

You may prefer to email me your situation and your desired goals. Your details will be kept strictly confidential.

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